goldielocks' ghost

[Catwoman]

ok. johnnygobbs has driven me to drinking over the damn ice princess. since he just had a birthday, i decided to write him a little fanfic with her so maybe he'll SHUT UP about her.

i hope the rest of you guys like it. i think its funny myself *giggle*





Goldielocks's Ghost

"Ahh! Ahh! Where did all these bats come from?!"

"They came out of the tree!"

"The tree?!"

"Yes, the tree!"

Pure pandemonium ensued in Gotham Plaza as a huge swarm of bats filled the air surrounding the giant Christmas tree, which had been illuminated by the Ice Princess's tragic fall onto the light switch.

Men and women ran for cover, swatting away at the winged-rodents with hats, scarves, anything they could get their hands on. Police tried to restore order, but it was no use as they too found themselves fighting off the bats. One young officer fired his gun in hopes of scattering them, but they attacked him as a result.

The Ice Princess's body lay on the smashed button, seemingly forgotten by the Gothamites only interested in saving themselves in their run from the bats.

Within moments, the the Plaza was completely cleared of any living soul and the bats gradually disipated, leaving an eerily quiet scene in the city square.

As Batman was in the process of trying to elude the police while trapped aboard a Batmobile under the control of The Penguin and the Catwoman, bruised and bloodied from her fall through a greenhouse, made her way back to her apartment, an interesting thing happened.

"Whew," The Princess said, sitting upright. "That was weird!"

She looked around her for a moment. Then she looked up at the tree, which with the bats now absent, was quietly glowing.

"Oh how pretty!" she squealed with excitement. She hopped up and skipped up to it to get a better view. "Oooooo" she said, mesmerised by all the shiny ornaments and sparkly lights.

She looked around. "Huh. Where is everybody?" she asked, putting her hands on her hips.

Then she looked down. "EEK!" she cried when she saw her body lying on the button, motionless. "What am I doing down there if I'm standing right here?!"

She gasped and covered her mouth.

"I got knocked out of my body! I hit so hard that I fell right out! Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh!"

She paced back and forth, trying to figure out how  to "rejoin herself."

"I've got it!" she shouted, snapping her fingers. She lay down on her body, in its exact pose, and squinched her eyes tightly.

"One. Two. THREE!"

She opened her eyes and held her right arm over her face.

"I did it!" she screamed. "I'm back in my-"

She stopped cold as she looked over to see her body's lifeless arm.

"EEK!" she screamed. "I've got three arms! AAAAHHHH!"

The Princess jumped up and ran around in circles, frantic, until she noticed that she now only had two arms again.

"Oh. It didn't work. Darnit!"

She kicked at the ground and crossed her arms, fuming.

"I guess I have to get in there harder. Can't do it gently or I can't break in. But how can I....oh I know!"

The Princess stepped a few feet away from where her corpse lay, then crouched down. Then, like a frog, she lept onto her body, as though she were trying to land in it.

"Did it work?" she asked, standing up. She turned around, again to see the body still lying in place.

"Shoot," she pouted.

Right about then, three men made their way up to where the body was.

"Um, hi, can you help me get back in there?" The Princess asked as they approached. She pointed at the corpse. "You see, I've, uh, I've got a little problem."

The men literally looked - and walked - right through her.

"How rude!" she cried, again placing her hands on her hips.

"Well, thats a shame, ain't it," one of the men said.

"Well DUH its a big shame!" she shouted. "I can't get in my bod-"

"Eh, one less Barbie doll in the world. No big loss," a second man added.

The Princess was incensed. "Barbie doll? BARBIE DOLL?! I'll HAVE YOU KNOW, MISTER, THAT I AM-"

"She sure crushed that box," the third man spoke up. "Wonder how much she weighed. 140? 150?"

The Princess merely looked at him for a moment. "Oh. No. You. Didn't."

"I hear that was a first-rate dye job," the second man said, gesturing to her hair. "I wouldn't be surprised," said the third.

"Dye?!" The Princess cried. No I didn't dye! I may have died but I didn't dye!"

"Ahh, I think it was all natural," said the first man.

"Aw, thanks sweetie!"

"She had to be," he continued. "I mean she was only the emptiest head in Gotham since ol' Benito blew his brains out last Christmas."

The Princess just looked on, her back slightly hunched, her arms drooped at her side, as the three men shared a cackle and went on their way.

She sniffled, biting her lip, and finally burst into tears.

"Waaaaah! I want my body back! Waaaaaah! I'm so alone and so scared! Waaaaaah!"

"Fear not," she heard a gentle voice say. Startled, she jumped ten feet in the air and turned around. A pretty woman stood, wearing a shimmery gown.

"Who-who are you?" The Princess asked, a little bit frightened.

"I'm an Angel, Cristi," the woman said, "and I'm here to take you home."

"Okay," The Princess replied. "I dunno how you know my name, but I'm ready to go home and get some sleep. Lets get on it."

The woman smiled. "Give me your hand and walk with me," she said.

"Walk?" The Princess asked.

"Mmm hmm," the woman nodded.

"No way, girlfriend," The Princess said, shaking her head. "If you wanna walk across Gotham City you can, but I'm not. Too many weirdos out and plus have you ever tried walking 20 blocks in stilleto heels? Not happening."

The woman's smile faded. Her face changed to one of annoyed disbelief. She looked up to the sky.

"Oh you're a funny one, aren't you," she grumbled to the Almighty.

Then she looked back at The Princess. She roughly grabbed her hand. "Lets go!" she said, dragging The Princess along behind her.

"I already told you! I'm not walking all that way in these boots! I mean, come on, these things aren't even made to walk in. You know that song 'These boots are made for walkin'?' Well these ain't!"

The Princess continued her protests as they walked along, gradually fading into nothingness.

In a moment, they were gone.

[GBglide]

LOL, I like it!

[Catwoman]

thank you. 

[gordonblu]

That was pretty sweet.

[Catwoman]

 

[Paul (ral)]

that was fun

[Catwoman]

hehehehe

[riddler]

I know I haven't spoken to you in a while but I am really enjoying your fiction. You do great work and I hope you continue.